International Women’s Day

NOTE: Nothing is 100%. These examples are not indicative of every interaction and individual ever. It is in the context of incidents that have occurred.

Although I initially had plans for some great International Women’s Day content…I got a little skewed. I wanted to showcase local women who are leaders in business, politics, sports, and more. I would like, eventually, to do profiles on some of these women!

But in the never ending round of “now what” negatives that make up my life, I was caught unexpectedly when I learned my hours at work were being cut to part-time and that due to costs, my contract wasn’t being extended so I’m headed for the unemployment block.

I’ve been cranky. Questioning every life decision and my career. My skills set. Lots of thoughts on the negatives. Writer’s block that is like a concrete wall. Typical extensional crisis stuff.

And, busy, looking at new jobs and where I want to go and whatnot. So, I got distracted, then it was too late to go with my original plan, and then I just didn’t have any ideas for IWD.

However, it was a pleasant surprise scrolling through social media today and finding myself inspired. Ideas coming together like yarn being rolled into a ball.

More often than I care to admit, I don’t speak up as much as I’d like to. I am probably more timid than people realize. But also at times, I don’t want to have to justify my feelings and opinions in conversations. I don’t want to come across as a bitch for being opinionated.

Personally, when it comes to being a woman in men-dominated fields, I’ve been pretty damn lucky. I hear horror stories, and it makes me grateful, which is also kind of sad because being treated equally shouldn’t be considered a plus rather than the standards.

Gendered Language

I’ve noticed in conversation where a woman who is a firefighter is mentioned, she’s almost always “female firefighter.” Not just firefighter (Note: It never bothered me to be called a “fireman/firemen.” English sucks at gender neutral language; I know people aren’t intending to say that I’m a guy.). Do I think it is meant maliciously? No. Do I wonder how many of the guys who say “I don’t have a problem with women in the fire service but…” actually do have a problem with women in the fire service? Yes.

It astounds me how often I was told I couldn’t be a firefighter because of my gender.

But I don’t think that people realize that while we can say “best person for the job,” / “I treat everyone equally,” all we want, those distinctions do set us apart. You say “female firefighter,” and it separates us. (Also, I hate when people say male nurse or male teacher. Dumb.)

Ginger Zee is a great example of “owning” her career - she’s a meteorologist, not a “weather girl;” she has the degree and expertise and isn’t settling for anything less than the recognition she’s earned.

Not long ago, I realized that there isn’t a job or accolade or whatever that I could earn where the argument “She only got it because she’s a woman” isn’t possible. That’s weird. As much as we say it doesn’t matter, there’s someone who will still use gender as reasoning, rather than believing that person is deserving of it.

Glass Ceiling

I came across a quote today that I really like: “Ignore the glass ceiling and do the work. If you’re focusing on the glass ceiling, focusing on what you don’t have, focusing on the limitations, then you will be limited.” Thank you Ava Duvernay! This brings up a really great point that I know I am guilty of - focusing on the nots. I’m not strong enough. Smart enough. I’ll never be enough. Everything I’m lacking, not what I have to get there.

And there is the flip side, how will I be received? Where men are called leaders, women are called bossy. Where men are called passionate, women are called emotional. Often, men aren’t considered emotional which is weird because they’re human. But we often hear that women are too emotional to be leaders, especially in politics. President Nixon, infamous for paranoia among other things, didn’t think women had the emotional bandwidth for politics. Friends…I give you former President Lyndon B. Johnson. Go down a Google rabbit hole if you don’t know what I’m talking about.

Feminist Isn’t a Bad Word

Sometimes it feels like “feminist” is a bad word, and I hate feeling like that. I shouldn’t see being labeled a “feminist” (Screw labels.) as a negative. Whether we’ll admit it or not, bias and sexism are still way too present in this world.

I never thought of myself as potentially weaker because I am a woman until someone told me that was the case, and that type of thing didn’t come up until my teens because my parents certainly didn’t raise me to think of myself as the “weaker sex.”

(After all, I am a Jedi, like my father before me)

While we’ve made strides, there are still miles to go. And it starts with me - with not worrying about those connotations and being who I am, owning my beliefs. Not seeing “feminism” as a “bad word.” It starts with me, not being afraid to call out misogynistic behavior. It starts with me, supporting other women. It starts with me, treating everyone with the equality I am talking about.

And it starts with you.

To end, I’d like to share some real-life and pop culture quotes to round out International Women’s Day.